Tuesday, November 2, 2010

My 40 Day Purpose Driven Life Challenge by Christina

Well, today is day 2 of my challenge. In Chapter 2, of the book it is titled "You were not a accident". It pretty much was saying that it was not by chance or mishap that you were created. God uniquely designed a individual blueprint for each of us. He knew exactly what he wanted you to look like, the color and race you are, the texture of your hair and curves on your body, etc. He knew which parents to pick for you whether they were good, bad or indifferent as ppl and parents. Inside of them was the perfect combination of chromosomes and DNA that would would create You! It says in Psalms 139:14 how you were "fearfully and wonderfully made". Wow, that means everything He created in you is wonderful. The talents, the gifts, your physical appearence they are all wonderful in His sight. God knew you before he formed you in your mother's whom. Before He created you He had specific instructions for your life, and for Your purpose in life. Which is ultimately to do His will, which is a journey in its self. Which brings me to my thoughts for today. For so long, for the most part of my life. I struggled with loving me as a whole. I can always remember being younger struggling with my weight. Especially, concerning my thighs. I've always had big legs and a small waist. I just remember being very insecure and it didn't help that my siblings would tease me about it all the time. So growing up, I had this idea in my mind that big thighs were ugly, which spilled into my adulthood. I've always tried to hide them. Honestly, I can't remember the last time I even wore a pair of shorts, matter of fact , I don't even own a pair of shortd. It's sad, the very thing God made so unique about me, I've tried to hide all my life. It was so bad that sometimes, I would even have dreams where I would be in a crowded place and everything would be ok... until I realized I had no pants on, just my underware. The crazy part was that I wasn't tripped up about being in my underware, it was because the world could now see my imperfections, the thing I was most insecure about. It's amazing that our insecurities can grip us and put you in bondage. And although this may be a superficial issue, it effects me spiritually. I have always been a free spirit and where the spirit of the Lord is there freedom. Which is what I am seeing now. I just think back to all the times I never wore shorts, because I was too embrassed of the very thing God made unique to me. I allowed my fears to grip me by not owning my flaws which were really my perfections. Its no wonder, I had a difficult time in being confident as a person and in my gifts. But, oneday about 2 years ago, I gave all my insecurities over to God and I decided I was tired of being as caught up on something so trivial. There's was no way I was going to allow my insecurities, to stand in the way of walking in the purpose God has for my life. I am no accident, my curves are no accidents, the gifts God has placed in me is no accident. I am ready to fulfill God's will and that comes with accepting Myself!!! All Glory be unto God
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